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Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday The 13th
Taken from the: Mutant Reviewers from Hell do at
Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the Thirteenth
"Rule number one: exaggerate everything"

    Summary Capsule
    A Scream/horror movie parody funnier than Scream? I think so!

    Mutant Meter Ratings

    Cult 3
    Quotes 5
    Offensiveness 2
    Bizarre 3
    Rewatchability 4

    The Scoop

    Rated R
    Horror Spoof

    John Blanchard

    Julie Benz
    Harley Cross
    Danny Strong
    Tiffani-Amber Thiessen

    Justin's Rating: If nothing else, I learned about the dangers of Ex-Lax from this film
    Justin's Review: Cast your mind back to the cinematic tragedy which was the summer of 2000. You there? It was the worst summer movie season ever, at least until summer of 2001, and moviegoers became so starved for entertainment that a low-budget Scream-ripoff named Scary Movie was elevated to one of the most popular films of the summer. Despite being completely gross, unoriginal and devoid of laughter, movie audiences flocked to this Wayans brothers' sign of the Apocalypse. Amid the short-lived sensation that was Scary Movie and Scary Movie 2, few people realized that another, much better horror movie parody was first in the works, only to be run over by cultural ignorance and sentenced to Straight To Video Hell.

    I only caught Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the Thirteenth on cable myself, and have been kicking myself ever since for not rooting out this film earlier. A casual glance might label Shriek cheezier and even more low-brow than Scary Movie, but then a casual glance at me might label me "three-eyed" and "capable of spontaneous acne", so who's to judge a video by its ripoff cover? Not you, Mr. Cheetoes-on-your-breath and Ms. Blunderbra!

    Let's quickly compare the differences between these two postmodern works of satire. Scary Movie was essentially a Gus Van Sant Psycho remake, shot-for-shot, of the original Scream, using completely dumb names for characters, shoving homosexual references through the roof, and going for the gross-out when at all possible. Shriek is more of a Hot Shots!-style parody, taking potshots at horror movies across the board with other pop culture references thrown in, making slight homosexual references, and using slightly less dumb names for the characters (Screw was funny, Slab not so much). Although the sight gags are sometimes priceless, Shriek's main strength is the hilarious and often times original dialogue.

    New kid Dawson attends Bulimia High School, on the eve of a senseless murder. He teams up with Slab, a jock sans brains; Barbara, the blonde beauty queen; Martina, who may or may not be a lesbian; and poor, poor Boner, cursed with a mispronouncable name. While they might be parody characters of horror and high school films, they're extremely fun and likable as a group (watch them rip up mall cop Doughy as a team). While Scream and I Know What You Did Last Summer are obvious influencing factors, the kids seem to bump into practically every horror film, from Friday the 13th to Child's Play to Porky's to Grease. Yes, Grease. There are so many terrific scenes that it's hard to pick out one to share. Well, during the scene where Barbara is cornered in the bathroom by the killer and the Mentos song comes on, she gets all perky and does the idiotic things the Mentos freaks typically do and manages to thwart the killer in the process. That was so very grin-worthy.

    Naturally, there's a killer (whose identity is extremely suspect), and one of the best running gags in the film involve the ghostface offing students in the background of every third scene or so. He's pretty much constantly fooled by the main cast, which kept cracking me up. For instance, the Killer starts chasing Martina on the track course, but the cheering fans convince him to win the race instead. He's all happy, getting doused with Gatorade and picked up by fans, and then kinda realizes he lost his prey.

    I feel many of the lesser parody movies fail because they try, they do not do or do not. Wow, we got all kinds of grammar structure there. Do-over: I feel many of the lesser parodies fail because the filmmakers become so enamoured with a single joke that they'll make it the basis for an entire scene, foregoing any other laughs until the scene is over. Shriek knows we are the ADD Generation and it does us good, Naked Gun-like. We get constant jokes peppered in every scene, running gags that aren't overdone, so that even when a joke does fall flat (and hey, some do), we're on to the next funny joke before we even notice. And, to my everlasting sack of joy, there are some jokes that are even (wait for it...) SUBTLE! Not pushed up into my eyeballs in an effort to force me to laugh!

    I cannot stress this enough: THIS IS HILARIOUS!. There, caps and bold font and everything. I am going directly to the video store to pick up a copy, no lie, and I'll probably be shoving it down people's throats for the next few weeks. Honestly, I don't think there's a movie out there that parodies so many other films and TV shows and pop culture references in one fell swoop! Maybe there's little justice in the world, when a trashy flick like Scary Movie gets all the press and Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the Thirteenth remains a relatively undiscovered classic, but maybe the fabeled Powers of the Mutants can restore honor and dignity to a genre-of-a-genre long since dead on arrival. Mutant Powers, activate! Form of... Freddy claw! Form of... ice cube tray!

    Andie's Rating: What's wrong with a promising future in a light weight sorority at a state college?
    Andie's Review: Okay, so I was fairly hesitant to view this movie because for the most part, I hated Scary Movie. I thought its parodies were lame. I could've written better stuff. And I thought it was extremely gross at parts. I figured since Shriek was a straight-to-video-Scary-Movie that it couldn't possibly be good at all. Well, slap my ass and call me Judy! Honestly, I thought this movie was extremely humorous. Of course it was dumb, most parody movies are, but it's dumbness was hysterical and it did such a better job in parodying movies than Scary Movie.

    What I liked most about Shriek is that it wasn't just a parody of Scream and I Know What You Did Last Summer, which is nice because another movie featuring Jennifer-Sarah-Felicity-Love-Shannon-Rose's breasts would've been too much for me. Anyway, those two movies were the basis for the plot, but a lot of other movies were made fun of and there were a lot of things that weren't parodies that were incredibly funny too. For starters, the character names were great. My personal favorite was Hagitha Utslay. It takes you a minute to catch on, which is nice because it isn't just thrown in your face. I also liked Dawson and Boner, and the "is she or not" butch character being named Martina was classic. I think her sexual orientation was a lot funnier than the guy in Scary Movie because it was slightly more subtle. Slightly. There is, however, a line about tacos that made me laugh really hard, even if it is pretty gross.

    I think my favorite running gag is that in almost every scene the killer is just in the background snatching people. It's so funny! The best snatch is in the hall at school where the killer just comes out of a locker and grabs a girl and drags her inside. Also, what's nice about watching this movie on DVD is that you can pause it perfectly to read all the funky little signs in the background, which are a nice attention to detail. Things like that make a movie like this worth of multiple viewings. The opening scene is also great, I like how the killer starts off in a hockey mask and his face melts into the Scream face. That was ingenius.

    From the cats named Cheap Shot, Lame Gag, and Dead Horse to the Pop-Up Video chase scene to the hilarious Grease parody, this movie is definitely worth a viewing, if for nothing else than to hear what comes over the PA system at this high school. The voice who says them is so monotone and serious, it is so funny!!! As far as parodies go, it's no Airplane, but it certainly captures the teen movie craze better than Scary Movie did. This movie is actually making me curious to see Another Teen Movie and compare. So go check out Shriek if You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th.

    Didja Notice?

    Outwit your killer by running around the kitchen island for 500 laps
    How the ghostface mask came to be
    Bulimia Falls High School "Bingers & Purgers Welcome!"
    New kids ARE singled out!
    That Boner kid is Danny Strong, Jonathan from Buffy the Vampire Slayer! You know, that geeky kid who Buffy was always saving, and in the sixth season is one of the nerd villains.
    Girls' imaginations are way more twisted than guys'
    Fish and guns on display at the principal's office
    "KILLER" in number 32 jersey
    An Anthrax missile in the school... eerie, huh?
    empTV (I just loved this parody slogan)
    Schools have tanning salons
    Mrs. Tingle as a teacher (parody of the Katie Holmes "Teaching Mrs. Tingle" film)
    "Frankenstein: Not all angry villagers were anti-semites"
    Baywatch slo-mo running!
    CPR has never been sexier
    Vending machines with term papers, handguns, and alibis
    Overflowing trashcan, "Notes from the Killer"
    Truly awesome Mentos parody
    My dear Lord... a Grease parody song
    Chariots of Fire song during race
    Rock, paper, scissors!
    What is it with sorority girls and Zima?(or kissing babies?)
    Sometimes you just can't kill a girl with a garage door opener
    Pop-up video chase scene
    Tom Arnold really didn't need to be in this film
    After the end credits, stay tuned for a "Where The Hell Are They Now?" segment

    The Movie Store!
    Shriek if You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th: Movie [VHS]
    Shriek if You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th : Movie [DVD]

    The TV version changes the part that tells what happened to Slab, a still picture of him is shown where his eyebrows have grown in from steroids; theatrical version has a still shot of his head exploding.

    Premiered October 17th, 2000 on the USA Network

    Groovy Quotes

    [call waiting beeps]
    Screw: Is that yours or mine?
    Killer: Ignore it. I have voice mail.

    Killer: Do you like scary movies?
    Screw: Oh, you mean like Spike Lee movies?
    Killer: Look, lay off the Spikester, he's keeping it real!

    Screw: Math? How my supposed to know that? I'm a beautiful popular rich kid with a promising future in a light weight sorority at a state college. I don't need to know that stuff, I'm gonna get married.

    Newspaper headline: "Popular Slut Killer--Football Team Mourns"

    Killer: Do you think this stalking this is easy?
    [splash sound heard]
    Screw: Did you just fall in my pool?

    School PA: Cheerleader tryouts will be held today in the gym. You must be 18 and comfortable with partial nudity.

    PA: Attention students--The fight between the Bloods and the Crips is postponed until next Friday. Refreshments and a lovely dance will follow.

    PA: Attention students--The band fundraiser will be held next Thursday in the auditorium. Liquor in the front, poker in the rear.

    Martina: I've got a weird feeling Dawson
    Dawson: Wait til you eat the tuna tacos.

    PA: Would the following students please report to the Principal's office: Jack Mehoff, Mike Hunt, Lou Zer, and Heywood Jablomee

    PA: Attention--tonight's PTA meeting will be held at the Hooter's Restaurant in Glendale. Please remind your parents. Also, whoever put real meat in today's lunch please remove it.

    [after the awesome Grease sendup]
    Guy 1: You're a fag.
    Guy 2: Let's go write it on his locker.
    Dawson: Of course it's stupid if no one else sings!

    Secretary: Dawson, let me introduce you to the principal. Sorry, The Administrator-Formerly-Known-As-Principal.

    Martina: Did you hear the news? About Screw. She was killed. Murdered. Gutted. Flayed. Sliced. Diced. Fried. And hung.
    Boner: I'm never gonna get laid.
    Martina: Oh, and it's all over the TV news.
    Boner: Oh, great! Now everybody knows.

    Barbara: Well, at least I feel safe here. Hi Chucky!
    Little kid with knives: Wanna play?!

    Dawson: What's the big deal? Kids get killed every day. This is high school.
    Guy: No, Dawson, this kid was white!

    Barbara: What are you doing here anyway, Doughey? You're not a real cop. Shouldn't you be guarding the Orange Julius?
    Boner: [fake coughing] N.Y.Kiddy.GAP!
    Slab: [fake coughing] Sergeant Sears!
    Barbara: [fake coughing] Food court police!

    Martina: Who cares about that crap?
    Doughy: [pause] I do.

    Boner: Hey guys, I have an idea! Let's all make a pact to lose our virginity before graduation!
    Doughy: [high five] I'm in!
    Everybody Else: We're not.

    Hagatha: Actually, it's on cable. But it's just as important!
    Doughy: Well, that's more important! On cable you can say [obvious fake dubbing] dyke, boobies, butts, bastards...

    Mrs. Tingle: Who can tell me if Frankenstein was circumcized?

    Doughy: Hagatha. Now that's a beautiful name.
    Hagatha: Thanks. My friends call me Hag.

    Nurse: Sex can be a beautiful, sensual experience between a man and a woman who truly love each other and want to spend eternity together laying in each other's gentle embrace. Or it can be a dirty, filthy spank-fest in a bus station restroom shared by two anonymous consenting adults on a layover in Detroit and no one ever need know!

    Nurse: ...and that's how I knew I wasn't a lesbian!

    Hagatha: [looking at photos] Who's that? Your grandmother?
    Doughy: With the bong? Yeah.

    Host: Do you have a reservation sir?
    Dawson: Dawson.
    Host: Party of five?
    Dawson: Wrong network!

    Martina: Didn't your whole family get chopped up and fed to a fish farm?
    Dawson: Allegedly.

    Dawson: After all, it IS Halloween.
    Slab: And Friday the 13th!
    Dawson: On the same day? Impossible.
    Boner: Slab's dyslexic.

    Barbara: And so what if Boner's dad was cheating with my mom causing her to go on a downward spiral resulting into alcoholism?
    Boner: [pause] My dad has what?

    Dawson: You know what we've gotta do? We've gotta get out of here!
    Boner: To someplace safe.
    Martina: Yeah, in the middle of nowhere.
    Slab: In the dark woods and pouring rain.
    Dawson: Without any adult supervision or police protection anywhere in the vicinity.
    Barbara: I know just the place! It's been totally deserted ever since those dorky kids were dismembered.
    Boner: Are you talking about band camp?

    Song: Death goes better with Mentals freshmaker!

    School PA: [nod to "Airplane!"] The white zone is for loading and unloading of passengers only.

    Teacher: Hello gang, welcome to Sex Education. If you aren't registered for this course or are a Southern Baptist, you're in the wrong room.

    Teacher: I just need a volunteer to put some fueler in the projector. Anyone? Fueler? Fueler?

    Martina: All right, listen. There are certain rules that you have to follow in a parody situation if you want to survive. Rule number one: exaggerate everything. Number 88: accept the ridiculous as logical. [flash to Boner getting down with a girl] Sexual sight gags, always funny. [Boner making sex noises while pulling out a splinter] And along with wacky sound effects... [Boner unzipping his pants with a "boing!" sound] And unlimited absurdity. [Killer frightens Boner into a heart attack with a chainsaw] Remember: nothing is sacred. [cross falls onto bed]
    Dawson: You're forgetting, point out the obvious. [holds up a "dead man" sign pointing to Slab]
    Martina: And finally, perpetually painful stereotypes.
    Black guy in pimp outfit: Dat's ridikkulous!

    Guy: Let's get down there before the coroner plays Weekend At Bernie's with him!

    PA: May I have your attention for the results of yesterday's pregnancy tests. Susan Savinski: negative. Melissa Blake: positive. Jonathan Whiner: negative.

    PA: Attention students--Flight 916 for Tuscany will be boarding at Gate 14A. The white zone is for loading and unloading of passengers only, no parking. ALso, today's happy hour will be held in the Biology lab. Remember, wings are free when you buy a pitcher.

    PA: Attention students--there will be a fire drill at 3:05 today. Please bring your own matches and lighter fluid.

    Doughy: Whereas Hardy enjoys a minuet, ballet ruse and crepes suzette,
    Hardy: Doughy likes to rock n roll, a hot dog makes him lose control.
    Hagitha: What a wild duet.
    Martina: Still they're cousins.
    Dawson: Identical cousins.
    Martina: They laugh alike.
    Dawson: They walk alike.
    Martina: At times they even talk alike.
    Hagitha: And you can lose your mind.

    Dawson: I thought you were a lesbian.
    Martina: A lesbian? Why?
    Dawson: Hello! You play softball, you watch Ally McBeal... the WNBA!
    Martina: No, Dawson, I'm not gay. Barbara's gay.
    Dawson: Barbara?
    Martina: Biiiiig Rosie fan.
    Dawson: But you are a witch?
    Martina: Oh yeah.

    Soundtrack Review
    Nothing too noticable, but I kinda liked the opening Scream song. Nice Halloween/Scream score for the flashback scenes. There's a reprise of the "School's out for summer" from Scream, and "Pretty in Pink" inexplicably during the chase scene.